Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Getting to Know You

I N C O M I N G : splat.

Oh look, another blog.

Why, yes, thanks for noticing.

Being the first post of a shiny new blog is a lot to live up to and begs the question: Now what? What to blog about? See, I've never been very good about journaling and even less so in public forums. I have a bad case of the doubts. Why would I have anything interesting to say and even if I do happen to think of a scintillating topic, how would anyone notice amid the noise of a thousand hands blogging simultaneously? Yet here I am. I read my friends blogs and I'm trusting them to read mine, or at least to leave friendly comments and pretend that they read every word of breathless prose.

Now what?

How about I tell you a little bit about myself? It will explain a lot and that way, when you're are reading my blog (please come back and read it again) and you're thinking I'm one crayon short of a full box, you can simply refer back to post one and refresh your memory.

Here is the awful truth that not everyone knows about me and I will reveal it to one and all on the great internet. I really am a soccer mom. With a minivan. And a seat on the PTO. And a Labrador Retriever. And a husband and two boys and a full time job as a lawyer. Wait for it, it gets better. I live in a cute, two-story house with green shutters and an honest-to-God white picket fence. Seriously. And that is where my resemblance to the apple-pie-baking, sweater-wearing, competitive mom of your nightmares ends.

Don't get me wrong, because I can bake a mean apple pie, but I'm a redneck soccer mom. I live in a tiny little town that you've never heard of with only 1250 people officially listed in the population. I suspect they count some of the cows.

We like to play farmer and live with a menagerie mostly comprised of rescues and throw away animals that no one wanted. Currently, we share living space with two large horses, a Shetland pony, three pygmy goats, a miniature donkey, three dogs, two cats, a geriatric goldfish, and an attack rabbit.

If you question how anyone can own an attack rabbit, you have clearly never livid in close proximity to a bunny. They are impossibly bossy and vigilant. I have ceded the dining room to the bunny. It is his territory. He allows us in. But he does have to share it with my son's telescope and a giant snake kite that my husband bought at an auction. (Hubby is just waiting for the right day to try it out.) This doesn't leave room for a dining room table, but so what? I'd rather have a bunny and a telescope and a snake kite than a fancy room. Sounds like chaos? It is. I'm that sort of mom and our life in Nameless Tiny Town is odd but satisfying.

So other than lawyering, farming, chauffeuring children and indulging in whatever interests take our fancy, what do I do with all my spare time? Unless you stumbled in here by accident and are diligently searching for a polite way to exit, you already know that I am a writer. That's mostly what I'll blog about. All things writer. What do I write? I write mystery and fantasy in all lengths, from 100 word drabbles (which I suck at) to 100,000 word novels (which I suck less at) and all things in between. I'll post some of my flash fiction and links to stories I've sold to online markets and kittehs.

Oh yes, there will be kittehs.

I'm addicted to LOLCATZ. I've tried twelve step programs, but they don't work for me because I don't really have a problem. I could quit the kittehs anytime I wanted to. I just don't want to.

So that is pretty much it. Now you know all about me. Well, not all about me, but enough that you could bluff your way through a test. Welcome to my thingymablog. Please stop a moment to say howdy. I'll bring cookies. You bring the tea.


Midnight Muse said...

It's Mrs. Cleaver! :D Yippie, you posted your first real live post, AND an LOL bunny, and had no troubles at all.

See how easy this is? Soon Pete will make for you a fancy new banner or sumfin' and you'll be a postin'-fool!

Arachne Jericho said...

Hi Mary!

You're on my RSS feeds now. Welcome to the blogosphere!

Pete said...

Mary, if you didn't already have me, then you would have had me at "take in animals." Go' blessh you, m'lady!

Lori said...


I knew you'd be good at this.

Mary B said...

Yay! Visitors! See, you all like me now, but tomorrow I'm blogging about my affection for outlines.

Now I need to figure out how to put links to other people's blogs on the side.

But first I had to know how to post kitteh pics. It's all about priorities.

SanRemoAve said...


You sound like my sister. Complete with menagerie and rescue animals. Love your blog name and LOLCatz header, of course!

Mary B said...

Thanks, Melissa! Credit goes to Pete for making the banner. Yes, I live in a zoo (including the small house apes known as children).

Arachne Jericho said...

Nice banner! It's very you. :D

TJWriter said...

Go to see you in the blog world.

We rescue animals too. And chaos is a grand part of life.

Ed Pahule said...

A real soccer mom.

I'm skeered.

Not of you, of those silly LOLCatz. Can't stand the things, don't ya know?

Well, nice to see you joined us out here in the insanity. Hope you have fun.

*wonders what arachne means by RSS feed*

TJWriter said...

Really Simple Syndication

My email program has them, and you can add websites with RSS feeds to it, where you can skim, preview, and click through when your favorite places have updated.

Arachne Jericho said...

You can also try out Google Reader.

RSS feeds are a way to centralize information streaming in from multiple sources that offer such a feed. For instance, pretty much all blogs and all news sites offer feeds that contain recently posted articles. Many blogs offer feeds for recently posted comments as well. Even some of the newer community software (like Vanilla) offer feeds.

This is how I deal with all my information on the net efficiently. It doesn't become a time blocker for me because I check my single point, Google Reader (which is a lot like checking mail). I read articles from my single point as well, and visit the site itself for posting comments and such. No more need to constantly visit sites hoping for updates.

I keep tabs on everybody in the Tea Debacle. :)

Pete said...

*blink* There's an echo in here. :)

Ed Pahule said...

Wow. I didn't realize just using "Favorites" was such a bother.

I'm so old-fashioned.

Cath said...

Welcome to blogdom, Mary! I'm looking forward to reading this one. :)